Crisis

We have all faced crisis. You can minimize it if you'd like, but it causes stress and anxiety on some level with just about anyone. There are some people who face a huge crisis and seem to be able to shrug off the stress. Visiting cancer patients in the hospital last fall, there was a woman who was there almost the entire time I rounded (4 months or so), but she always seemed to be pretty much at ease with things.

At the same time, there are those who blow their stacks at the smallest things. And, no, they aren't all 13 year-old drama magnets (the other one is 15... just kidding). They seem to learn how to handle life's issues by watching the latest Fox sitcom.

In thinking about the crises I've faced in my life, I cannot really pin down how I react. There have been times I have "turtled"... pulled the covers over my head and hoped it would just go away. There have been times when I've dug in and stood my ground. There have been a few notable times when I got hot and lost my temper. I'm not sure which (the first or the last reaction) I'm less proud of, actually. Escapism and avoidance of a problem (one of my weaknesses) is often doing to yourself what you would otherwise do to someone else.

None of us faced a bigger crisis than Jesus in the Garden of Gethsemane. Sorry, I don't care how big your issue is, the fate of the universe does not hinge on it as it did with Jesus.

In Luke 22:42, Jesus prayed "... not my will, but yours be done." So, facing the biggest crisis ever, what was the Son of God doing here? Turtling avoidance? I don't think so. If he was a turtle, why come to earth in the first place?

Was he being weak in confessing his desire not to do this? I've heard that before and frankly cannot fathom why the thought even occurs to someone. With the weight of all sin pressing upon him, under direct attack from the essence of evil, it is understandable and (I feel) a sign of strength even to express yourself like this. Considering how terrible he felt, to even be willing to continue is far more than heroic.

I do not see a man bitterly resigned to fate. His prayer while with the disciples before he arrived here (found in John) should make that plain.

Here was a man trusting in his Father's love to pull him through. Here was a man who could not see the outcome of all of this but trusted that Father would come through on THE plan of plans.

I want to pray like that. When I pray, "Your will be done," I don't think my motives are that pure. Sometimes I have prayed such prayers and add that phrase to the end of the statement as a means to excuse my own selfish requests. Extreme example: "Help me to win the lottery, but if not, Your will be done (of course)." I actually think such a phrase so badly used should show us how far off the mark we are and how much we need His mercy. It should expose my motives, especially if you think about what the Father actually wills: salvation... renewal... restoration... transformation...

What does it actually mean when we tell someone, "See you this weekend, Lord willing!" As if He doesn't will that we see each other? I suppose that if my seeing you is going to detract from His desire for our lives (salvation, renewal, restoration, transformation, etc.), then I can accept that. But, again, I find myself uncomfortable with the phrase as something just added on to the end of a conversation.

Look... what do I know, really? I don't know my own heart well enough, much less another's when we pray, "Your will be done." But I do know a little about Jesus. I know He loves me. I know He died for me, going through with the drinking of the cup that I deserved to gulp from. I know He wants me with Him forever. I know He wants me to be a changed man. I know He's doing more than His part for this to happen.

I know that much about His will. So I can say with confidence now (after taking you through the thought process to get here)... "Your will be done. Not mine."

Recognizing Father

Tomorrow brings another big day in our lives. I, my wife, and my mother all will be officially one year older. I'll be 39, one year shy of 4-0. I'm not sure why exactly, but that seems to be a defining year for most people. It's kind of that magic number that you get to in life that says, "You can no longer call yourself a young anything. The word 'middle-aged' is now what you're supposed to call yourself."

I have to say, however, that while there are signs there of getting older, for the most part I still feel like my regular self, for better and worse. One of those things that seems to evolve is how I recognize God in my life. One thing I liked when I was younger was how I could seem to get excited about recognizing God in the moment. If I heard a really good speaker, or a great concert, or participated in serving people, I could get that really awesome feeling in the moment. These days, it's not always as instantly apparent. I know He's there and doing things in my life, but I often don't recognize it until it's already happened.

I think for many it's easier to recognize the movement of God in the moment. I was a youth pastor for a long time, something I still miss doing. I think that part of the reason I loved doing that was the ability to see them recognize God in the moment. They weren't jaded by age, experience, skepticism, or whatever. They just seemed to get it!

One young person on a mission trip was in tears after we served several people in a remote village who had need of basic life necessities... clothing and medicine. In the moment, I was concerned about having enough and keeping the traffic flowing through the room so we could serve more people. This young person was getting it in the moment, while it took me a few hours to really see it for what it was (in hindsight)... God at work in powerful ways!

Even as I write this, I have to remember something of critical importance... God is always at work in powerful ways. Just because my senses are often too dull to notice it doesn't mean He isn't there and working supernatural stuff. Just the fact that I can stand here a forgiven man means something is happening and has happened.

In John 14:8-14, Jesus and Philip have an interesting conversation. Philip says to Jesus, "Lord, show us the Father..." Jesus: "Don't you know me, Philip,...? Anyone who has seen me has seen the Father..."

OK, then Jesus promises the disciples the Holy Spirit Who was to come in Jesus' Name. He even tells them they're better off if He leaves so that this would be possible. As it turns out, the Holy Spirit in them was the evidence of God living in them, being more intimate with them than at any time since the Garden.

That's amazing stuff! Consider it... if you have ever noticed the presence of God in you, working with you, doing things through you, serving people, performing a miracle, giving you an "aha!" moment as you read Scripture, whatever... that's the Holy Spirit living in and through you. When you see another person doing something that glorifies God, you have seen the Father! That's the gift of Jesus. That is experiencing God in ways that go even beyond getting a visual.

It seems to me we esteem this too lightly. At any moment, if I believe I am in His presence, it is an opportunity to glorify and experience Him. It doesn't matter if I'm alone or in the company of friends or with strangers. He is there. I have to believe I "have seen the Father," that I know what He is like. And if this is true, every moment can be filled with awe and wonder and amazement and worship.

If you're someone who just serves people and loves others, someone who breathes God's love without having to say anything, someone who can be filled with His joy in suffering or triumph... thank you! You have shown me the Father! I hope I am showing Him to you!